[Sharon]

Think of an example of when you adjusted your communication to meet another person’s style. Are you a thinker, feeler, doer or imaginer? Why do you believe that is your style? Share your example and thoughts on the discussion forum.

[Claire]

A very recent example of how I needed to adjust my communication to meet another person’s style was just yesterday on day shift. I had a family, in particular one of the daughters, that I now understand to be a person with a “thinker” style of communication. I realized that I needed to adjust my communication from my more comfortable “feeler” style, to one based on providing details to facilitate connection and communicate the message I was trying to convey more effectively.

She sat quietly in room while I discussed her loved ones status change with her and the other members of her family. She interjected after remaining quiet for some time with very specific questions relating to the medications both routine and PRN that I had administered. She seemed to rely heavily on past experiences and interventions that had previously been successful, and was anxious and seeking answers for the need for changes when the old ones had ” always worked”.

I have historically found “thinker” style communicators somewhat challenging, and this case was no exception. I have felt this way as they seem to differ in their focus so significantly from what my “feeler” approach values as important. I understand now that this is my style, as I have always built “connection ” and therapeutic relationships with people through the sharing feelings, stories and arriving at decisions through collaboration.

I questioned why “thinkers” would focused on details and data instead of what I would describe as the general “sense” of a situation. This family member was, what I felt at the time, fixated on the medications, times and doses and less on holistic nature of multiple interventions that are not as measurable. This I now understand to be a misconception on my part. It is not that they are limited in the scope of how they wish to approach, view or value the quality of a loved ones palliation, but rather they need to focus on these kinds of details to have the knowledge they feel they require prior to moving forward.

This reality required me to tell this family member that I needed to go and review the MAR and past PRN doses/timings to be able to answer her questions properly. I came back to the conversation with a much more detailed facts- based discussion to appease her style. I provided health teaching with a discussion on the PPS % scoring and what data these percentage scores were based on to satisfy her drive to sooth herself with numbers. By rising up to meet her within her communication style to build “connection” I was able to then ease into a more general goals of care conversation that discussed overall quality of life once she felt engaged with enough to listen .

[Janet]

As a nurse, I encounter challenges when communicating with thinkers, similar to the examples you provided. I also face difficulties with imaginers, who may struggle to articulate complex situations and frequently pose hypothetical questions. Overall, nursing requires us to adeptly navigate a variety of communication styles every day.

[Alhasan]

As a thinker, I naturally gravitate towards data-driven and logical communication. However, in my role as a nurse case manager, I often interact with families of medically complex individuals who tend to be feelers. These families value emotional connections and personalized communication, which requires me to adjust my approach to meet their needs.

When interacting with these families, I typically come well-prepared with extensive documentation, including charting and Medication Administration Records (MARs). My initial approach is to provide detailed information supported by data and factual evidence about their loved one’s medical condition and care plan. However, I consciously adjust my communication style by showing more emotion, emphasizing aspects of the care plan that improve quality of life, and tailoring my communication to each family’s unique preferences.

By making these adjustments, I build stronger connections with the families, ensuring they feel heard and supported. This approach not only helps in providing holistic care but also fosters trust and cooperation, which are essential in managing the complex needs of their loved ones. As a thinker, I value logical reasoning and structured problem-solving, but I recognize the importance of adapting my style to connect effectively with others, particularly in emotionally sensitive situations.

[Barinder]

I believe I am naturally a thinker as I tend to communicate based on logical, analysis of information and critical thinking. Recently, there was a situation at work where a client was experiencing a panic attack. They voiced this was the first time they have experienced such sensation thus felt very overwhelmed. I found switching to communicated based on traits encompassed of a ‘feeler’ made the client feel more comfortable and relaxed. By engaging in informal dialogue and focusing on collaboration, we were able to overcome the situation. I found the client was at first hesitant to communicate with myself , thus I asked a colleague the client was close with to join us, as this helped the client feel safe and comfortable. Once the panic attack passed, we discussed interventions that could be helpful in case they were to experience it again. As this was not a medical emergency, I focused on the emotional needs of the client through feeler style communication.

[Carmen]

Hi Barinder,

It’s great to hear how you adapted your communication style to meet the needs of your client. Being able to shift your communication from thinker to feller really shows your empathy and flexibility. By focusing on the client’s emotional needs, you made them feel understood and supported which is important in those moments. Talking about future interventions afterwards was also a great way to blend emotional and logical approaches.

[Carmen]

I often adjust my communication style when interacting with students and tailoring it to a more direct/ straight-forward approach or a more open, detail oriented communication style depending on the individual. As the readings suggest, no one is strictly one style and it varies with the situation. Personally, I adapt my approach based on the need’s of the student. However, I tend to naturally gravitate towards thinker and feeler styles.

[Claire]

Hi Carmen,

I like how you mentioned that when you are communicating with students that you appeal to them in a direct /straight-forward approach. I was in nursing school not too long ago and would have appreciated this style. I think that by my instructor modelling this, it would have given me the confidence to be the same way back. It would have given me a sense of permission to be as direct and straight forth, to express any needs I was having or highlight any gaps in my learning.

Thanks Carmen!

[Melissa]

I believe my communication style is a feeler with a bit of thinker mixed in as I tend to tailor my communication in a more personal approach but I also like facts/details and like to be prepared and able to back up my information as needed.

An example of when I may need to adjust my communication style to meet another’s style is when interacting with a residents family members. Usually when speaking with them I like to have their MARS, Documentation and other important information they may have questions about so I am prepared and have factual documents to refer back to. While speaking to different families their communication styles vary largely. Sometimes I have to take on more of my “feeler” style that is my comfort zone in order to provide emotional support and ensure these families feel supported. On another hand I have had many family members who have more of an “Imaginer” communication style and I have had to tailor my communication style to meet their needs. An imaginer want’s to see the big idea’s and that we as a nursing team have considered multiple approaches for their loved one’s care. Tailoring my communication style to their’s allows me to communicate what myself and/or the team has done and what different options we have considered and maybe even tried for their loved one. This builds trust with this family member as they can see the team has not just “given up” after one try, the team has brainstormed and considered many approaches to their loved ones care.

[Janet]

I honestly believe I embody a blend of all three communication styles depending on the context. With my management team, I aim to be succinct and direct. When communicating with my staff and new hires, I combine empathy and analytical thinking. And when there’s a task at hand, I focus on taking action.

Recently, during a meeting with the UCPs I supervise, I acknowledged the realities of their job, recognizing that not every day is positive. I stressed the importance of learning from difficult days to implement small changes that lead to more positive outcomes. I also reminded my team to be mindful of the diverse communication styles of our clients and patients, emphasizing the need to overcome communication barriers with understanding and patience.

[Ruth]

I believe effective leadership needs diversity. I essentially adjusted my communication style when I was a preceptor. I used a combination of different communication styles to interact with my preceptee. The doer, the feeler, and the imaginer. For instance, I approach with a doer style to enforce the preceptee to produce good-quality patient care. With a feeler style, I create a participative atmosphere by opening a discussion and answering questions. And used an imaginary communication style by motivating the preceptee by letting the preceptee think about the future and letting the mission and vision serve as her inspiration.

[Sherri]

I can think of a time when I was instructed to practice hand hygiene, physical audits, during meal times. I complied with the administrator’s inclination. I had to envision myself as a boss/leader and use my task competence skills to guide, support, educate, motivate and encourage the PSW staff to conform to mandatory regulations. I place myself as a thinker and can relate to a procedure or process. Also, I am motivated by the sense of contribution.

[Sherri]

Janet,
I agree Nurses have to adapt and navigate to a variety of communication styles daily.

[Author]

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